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Entertainment Media Analysis Report
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MAR25012
(2005), PG-13 [R-13*]
Analysis Date
CAP Final Score
CAP Influence Density
MinMax
February 16, 2005
45 out of 100
0.99
-94

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Christian Long Distance

SUMMARY / COMMENTARY:
(This section may be and sometimes is somewhat subjective.)

If Scriptural references appear, the full text appears at the end of the Summary / Commentary.



(2005), PG-13 [R-13*] --... it was clearly not a homosexual inference.


Cast/Crew Details Courtesy Internet Movie Database
Production (US): Columbia Pictures Corporation, Overbrook Entertainment
Distribution (US): Sony Pictures Entertainment, Columbia Pictures
Director(s): Andy Tennant
Producer(s): James Lassiter, Wink Mordaunt, Will Smith, Michael Tadross, Teddy Zee
Written by: Kevin Bisch
Cinematography/Camera: Andrew Dunn
Music: Alan Elliott, George Fenton
Film Editing: Troy Takaki, Tracey Wadmore-Smith
Casting: Kathleen Chopin
Production Design: Jane Musky
Art Direction: Patricia Woodbridge
Viewed At: Driftwood Theater 6


I am so sorry this report is so late (it is now March 2, 2005, nearly a month after the release of the movie). By license the only time I can get out to view films is after the foster kids go to bed and mom is home. When mom is gone for five days there is no opportunity to get out without the kids to view films for analysis let alone build analysis reports and web pages. Such delays are likely and unpredictable until we can find enough funding that I can draw a salary at least equal to my wife's nurse salary, consistently and long-term, so she can quit and stay home with the seven kids (the only ones licensed/trained to care for the two foster kids within 50 miles are my wife and I). Also, since we are, by license, to avoid leaving only my wife or I with all seven kids unless they are in bed for the night and since the last showings at the local theater start before bedtime except for Friday and Saturday nights, Friday and Saturday nights are the only times I can get to the theater to view films for analysis, that is, when other family matters permit it. So, when mom is gone and/or the kids are not in bed for the night, the CAP Movie Ministry has to shut down. And I actually do need to sleep.

More bad news for the CAP "family." Due to financial stress, these Summary/Commentaries with Scriptural applications, the most time-consuming part of these analysis reports, must be discontinued or at least heavily abbreviated. Our "staff" is all volunteer so I cannot reduce expenses by a reduction in force (even typing that phrase stirs a swirl of discomfort in me). I must reduce expenses by reducing time/content. As with the last time this happened (and this time may be the last time this happens), the Summary/Commentary section may be reduced or discontinued for a while but the Findings/Scoring section will not be affected. The Findings/Scoring section is the heart of the CAP analysis model. The only way to discontinue it is to shut down.

Hitch is a story of a "date doctor", whose love life is empty. The pain of a previous love affair kept his shields up. But Alex "Hitch" Hitchens' (Will Smith) compensates by teaching men how to find the girl of their dreams, Among the number of episodes of Alex "Hitch" Hitchens' (Will Smith) match-making as the date doctor of New York, Hitch's shields drop for gossip columnists Sara (Eva Mendes) whose best friend was sexually victimized by one who appeared to be one of Hitch's clients.

Another of Hitch's clients was Albert (Kevin James), the plump tax accountant of O'Brian, Thompson & Kincaid who had fallen in love, if only one-sided, with one of the firm's millionaire clients, Allegra Cole (Amber Valletta). Albert stood up to the firm against their questionable advice to Allegra and lost his job but won her heart in doing so. Well, her respect and interest at the start anyway.

And there was one male to male kiss in this comedy but it was the first time I had seen such in a film where it was clearly not a homosexual inference.

Several capers of match-making freckle the script for nearly two hours (1 hour and 53 minutes, excluding trailers and credits). Also freckling the script and screen were examples of assault on morality and decency.

The greatest point loss is programming was found by the Sexual Immorality (S) investigation area; programming such as a man and a woman making out in bed, lots of excessive cleavage and sexually coarse/vulgar talk. Sexual Immorality found enough assaults on morality to lose all of the starting 100 points. [Mark 7:21, Gal. 5:19, 1Ths. 4:1-5] Second place in point loss is the programming found by the Offense to God (O) investigation area, due entirely to the use of God's name in vain. [Deut. 5:11] Tied for third place in point loss are Impudence/Hate (I), mainly due to foul language [Col. 3:8] and lying [Prov. 19:5], and Drugs/Alcohol (D), mainly due to booze, drinking and drug use [Eph. 5:18], both investigation areas found programming which earned scores equivalent in magnitude to R-rated films in the comparative baseline database, not in severity of examples but in the combined magnitude of all examples in each individual area (see CAP Rule of 1000 ). Hitch was not particularly violent [Prov. 3:31-32] or criminal [Hab. 2:12] and earned a Wanton Violence/Crime (W) investigation area score equivalent to scores earned by PG-rated films in the comparative baseline database. And there were no murders or suicides noted so the Murder/Suicide (M) investigation area earned a perfect G score of 100.


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SCRIPTURAL APPLICATION(S)
If needed to focus or fortify, applicable text is underlined or bracketed [ ] or bold. If you wish to have full context available, the Blue Letter Bible is a convenient source. If you use the Blue Letter Bible, a new window will open. Close it to return here or use "Window" in your browser's menu bar to alternate between the CAP page and the Blue Letter Bible page.

CHAPTER/VERSE

  • Mark 7:21 For from within, out of men's hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery,
  • Gal. 5:19 The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery;
  • 1Ths. 4:1-5 Finally, brothers, we instructed you how to live in order to please God, as in fact you are living. Now we ask you and urge you in the Lord Jesus to do this more and more. For you know what instructions we gave you by the authority of the Lord Jesus. It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his [or her] own body [which includes control of drives, touching, seeking, lusting (even after images), promiscuity, etc.] in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God;
  • Deut. 5:11 Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy God in vain: for the LORD will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain. [Vain is shav' {shawv}: emptiness, nothingness, vanity, such as an expletive. With or without the four letter expletive, the use of God's name in any way other than respect, reverence or thoughtful discussion is in vain. That includes the popular three syllable sentence with His name trailing it AND the misuse of Jesus' name.]
  • Col. 3:8 But now ye also put off all these; anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy communication out of your mouth.
  • Prov. 19:5 A false witness will not go unpunished, and he who pours out lies will not go free.
  • Eph. 5:18 Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit. ["Wine" can be any intoxicating substance. Though it is not a sin to drink, it is a sin to get drunk. A recent study http://www.acponline.org/journals/ecp/janfeb02/dalton.pdf has found an undeniable link between the presentation of alcoholic beverages and tobacco in and as entertainment and abuse of them by adolescents. And teaching/causing youth to abuse alcohol/tobacco by emboldening youth with them in and as entertainment invokes Luke 17:2]
  • Hab. 2:12 Woe to him who builds a city with bloodshed and establishes a town by crime! [The "city" or "town" is a place guarded and could be wealth.]

    ***Selected Scriptures of Armour against the influence of the entertainment industry***
  • Ps. 12:8 The wicked freely strut about [e.g., create progressively vile/offensive entertainment with impunity and no consequences to younger and younger audiences every year] when what is vile is honored among men [when enough people continue to defend it, embrace it, pay for it, enjoy it, want it, submit to it].
  • Col. 2:8 Beware lest any man [by his influence] spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men, after the rudiments of the world, and not after Christ.
  • 1 Cor. 15:33 Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners.
  • Rom. 5:19 For as by one man's disobedience many were made sinners, so by the obedience of one shall many be made righteous.
  • Jude 1:4 For there are certain men* crept in unawares [secretly slipped in among you], who were before of old ordained to this condemnation [whose condemnation was written about long ago], ungodly men, turning the grace of our God into lasciviousness [a license for immorality], and denying the only Lord God, and our Lord Jesus Christ. [*men: anthropos {anth'-ro-pos}, generic, a human being, whether male or female]
  • Matt. 25:40 And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto [or for] one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto [or for] me.
  • Luke 17:2 It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones. ["Offend": skandalizo - to entice to sin; to cause a person to begin to distrust and desert one whom he ought to trust and obey; to cause to fall away; to be offended in one, i.e. to see in another what I disapprove of and what hinders me from acknowledging his authority. "Little ones": mikros - little;, small of age; younger which can include at-home teens].
  • Ps. 119:133 Order my steps in thy word: and let not any iniquity have dominion over me [let no sin rule over me].
  • John 14:15 If ye love me, keep my commandments.
  • 1 Thess. 5:22 Abstain from all appearance of evil. ["Evil" includes all things that are sinful.]


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    As always, it is best to refer to the Findings/Scoring section -- the heart of the CAP analysis model -- for the most complete assessment possible of this movie.
  • FINDINGS / SCORING:
    (The heart of the CAP Analysis Model)

    Hitch (2005) CAP Thermometers

    Wanton Violence/Crime (W)
  • defensive maneuver
  • threat to do physical harm
  • extortion
  • vandalism
  • want of suicide doe to broken love
  • slapstick violence - vehicular

    Impudence/Hate (I)
  • 18 uses of the three/four letter word vocabulary
  • one use of the most foul of the foul words
  • claim that a liar is a nice person
  • deceit to impress a girl
  • lie

    Sexual Immorality (S)
  • woman in bed
  • sexual suggestion
  • man and woman making out in bed nude the morning after
  • sex talk, repeatedly
  • sexual innuendo, repeatedly
  • dressing to maximize the female form and/or skin exposure
  • excessive cleavage, repeatedly
  • rude gaze
  • admission of sexually immoral behavior, repeatedly
  • photo nudity
  • camera angle to force viewer on private parts
  • adult in underwear, repeatedly
  • vulgar sex comment
  • vulgar sex talk, repeatedly
  • mention of "gay"
  • crotch kick
  • vulgar innuendo

    Drugs/Alcohol (D):
  • booze, repeatedly
  • bar, repeatedly
  • drinking, repeatedly
  • abuse of medication
  • drug intoxication
  • guzzling

    Offense to God (O)
  • 21 uses of God's name in vain

    Murder/Suicide (M)
  • none noted





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    There are some in the entertainment industry who maintain that 1) violent programming is harmless because no studies exist that prove a connection between violent entertainment and aggressive behavior in children, and 2) young people know that television, movies, and video games are simply fantasy. Unfortunately, they are wrong on both accounts." And "Viewing violence may lead to real life violence." I applaud these associations for fortifying 1 Cor. 15:33. Read the rest of the story. From our more than eight years of study, I contend that other aberrant behaviors, attitudes, and expressions can be inserted in place of "violence" in that statement. Our Director - Child Psychology Support, a licensed psychologist and certified school psychologist concurs. For example, "Viewing arrogance against fair authority may lead to your kids defying you in real life." Or "Viewing sex may lead to sex in real life." Likewise and especially with impudence, hate and foul language. I further contend that any positive behavior can be inserted in place of "violence" with the same chance or likelihood of being a behavior template for the observer; of being incorporated into the behavior mechanics and/or coping skills of the observer. In choosing your entertainment, please consider carefully the "rest of the story" and our findings.



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